If you think that by just doing something once in a while, reading bits and pieces of relevant materials to achieving something that you say is your dream, you are indeed living in la la land. You cannot choose when to do something based on when you feel like it. There will be times that you just want to throw in the towel and catch up on sleep or watch your favourite show. Believe me, those things are real. Never say that it will not happen to you. That is not confidence, that is arrogance. Let go of all of that ego, stay humble and commit to putting in the hard work. A lot of people will not be able to do it. It could be for a various number of reason, but if you want to succeed, go back to your why. Why are you doing what you are doing. When you are very clear on that, remind yourself of it daily and work hard.